Movie Review: Transmorphers

Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Synopsis: Driven underground by alien robots, humanity's last hope for survival rests in a ragtag group of humans with a plan to destroy this mechanical horde once and for all.

Starring: Matt Wolf, Amy Weber, Griff Furst
Directed by: Leigh Scott
U.S. Rating: PG-13

I've read many different articles and reviews including the lists of the worst movies ever made. I've found so many different opinions and movies in these lists, but noone has ever mentioned or included Transmorphers! I'm so convinced that this film should be included in the highest rank of the worst movies ever made of all times...!

I wanted to watch the movie because I was highly recommended to watch it. Of course, I was advised that it could be considered the worst movie I could have ever watched... and believe me, I've watched horrible and crappy movies in my life! First, I decided to watch the trailer in Youtube, just to get an idea of the plot or something that would show me how bad it could be. The trailer was ok, nothing especial, but it hid professionally all its crappy content!

What was my surprise? I found more than the movie trailer in Youtube... I found the whole movie there. I clicked on the first clip and see how it was, since it was there, in Youtube. It would be extremely painful to rent something like this, believe me!

Then, something extremely weird happened. I found this film so... but sooo horrible, that it was actually hilarious and entertaining!!! I had to skip a few extremely boring parts, and I ended up watching the whole film.

I have my very own personal list of the worst films ever made, but it was totally shaken after watching this movie! I had to re-think all my values and rating system, since I was taken into a new dimension of bad films. So far, Transmorphers has made it to the top!

If I had to describe the plot, I could say that it is a cheap collage of the Terminator saga and Transformers, Universal Soldiers, Matrix Revolutions, aliens, robots... all mixed up in just one script, supported by the worst CGI effects ever created (Superman IV in 1987 had better effects!) and the most terrible actors/actresses ever placed in a film. 85% of the movie is filmed in 2 rooms and a short corredor. The script is so bad that there's so many details that make no sense at all!

According with the futuristic plot, the actors/actresses are being forced to live underground and developed a plan to defeat these robots who have conquered and dominated the Earth for over 300 years. All of them dress jeans, t-shirts and leather jackets. I've seen street skaters better protected than these guys, who wear a vest and other small things to protect their bodies. Their weapons are actually pretty funny! They look like they're made of PVC! When they used their weapons, the crappy effects (sounds and lights) don't match with their movements... it is so mediocre that makes it actually funny!

And if all this wasn't enough, the end of the film is so bad that if I had to pay for a DVD to watch the way it ends, I would go back... not to the DVD store, but to the DVD distributor!... and would have asked for my money back, plus a compensation for the time I lost watching this piece of garbage!

Anyway, if you want to watch the film, you can watch it from Youtube, just like I did. In fact, you can watch it with some comments added by the user who posted the film in Youtube. He really makes it enjoyable and hilarious!

Click here to watch it from Youtube

What did I like from this movie?

1. It has made me write the most extensive movie review so far in this blog!
2. I just found out that they made a new sequel this year, and it came to Blu-Ray!

What did I dislike from this movie?

1. Everything!

I know that our rating system is from 1 to 5, but I'll break the rule this time... I would rate this movie with a 0/5


What did you like or dislike from this movie? What would you rate this movie?


Enjoy it!... Watch it!

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